Dear Neve Guest post – A letter to my abusive father.

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Hi guys! I just want to thank this amazing blogger at giving this great opportunity to guest post on her blog! I appreciate it so so much!

Dear Father,

You don’t even deserve to be called that because a father is someone who cares, loves and supports his children, not what you did. I have wanted to confront you since the day you moved out this time last year. For the 17 years you were in my life you did nothing for me. You hurt me more than anyone in the world could ever hurt me. You hit me, punched me, pulled me around by the hair, broke my nose and verbally abused me for as long as I can remember.

You did this to me, you made me the person that I am today. I am strong because of you and I thank you for that. What you have done to me has scarred me mentally but one thing I can promise you that I will not allow your abuse to stop me from living my life. I will create the life I want. I’m doing that already by making the decision to not go to uni right away to focus on my mental health and on my blog.

We are not afraid of you anymore. That’s what people like you do, feed off people’s fear and use against them. We are survivors and you have not won and never will.  We are stronger than you ever will be. When we grow older and face new experiences and opportunities, you’ll miss out on all that and regret everything you ever did to us.

You always told me to tell the truth but when I used your teaching and told the truth, you called me a liar. You have always been a hypocrite. The people I care about, the judge and the police believed what me and my siblings said. We told the truth and prevailed through the lies and poison you were spreading.

You are a vile human being and you deserve to be on your own for the rest of your life. You could have had a wife and four loving children if you could have just gotten help for your anger like you always promised to do but you never did. If you did that there could have been a chance where we could have talked and worked on our relationship. Instead of trying to make us out to be liars you could have admitted what you have done to us and try to make things better.

Now you’re not allowed to see us or contact us. I want to thank you for showing me what a true abuser is. I can spot an abuser right away which saves me from getting into bad relationships. You have taught me to stand up for myself and to not let my anger take control and do horrible things to people that I would regret. Although I am not afraid to speak my mind and let people know when their words or actions have affected me.

You may have ruined my childhood but I promise you that you will never ruin my future. When I become successful and get married and start a family you will not be involved or even know about it all. I am changing my name to mum’s maiden name. I do not want to be associated with you or any member of your family or have anyone realise I’m in any way related to you.

This is the last time you will hear from me. I needed to write this to confront you and get all this off my chest.


Anne Carty.

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4 Replies to “Dear Neve Guest post – A letter to my abusive father.”

  1. This is such a brave and powerful letter 💖. Thank you for sharing Anne. It sounded like you went through an awful experience, I can’t imagine what you went through. I’m glad you feel stronger now. I wish you all the best, you deserve a happy and positive future 😘 xx

    Bexa | http://www.hellobexa.com

  2. Such an amazing and powerful post… I too come from an abusive household. A father who beat me, cracked my ribs, punched me in the head and treated me like a house slave. I’m not an adult with a family of my own and I’m so proud of what I’ve achieved in the same way I’m proud of you for speaking out and overcoming the one thing no girl should ever have to. It isn’t fair that the one relationship any girl could want is the very same one that we were denied by our selfish sperm donors. With you all the way hun, I’ve written more about it over on my blog as well (child abuse survivor post) xx


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